The 7 Types of Rest (and Why Sleep Isn’t Always the Answer)
We talk about exhaustion like it has one solution: sleep more.
While sleep absolutely matters, it turns out it’s often not the kind of rest we’re actually missing.
When I first learned there are seven distinct types of rest, it stopped me in my tracks. It explained so much about why so many of us feel bone tired, even when we’re technically “doing everything right” and getting 8 hours of sleep per night.
Turns out, more sleep isn’t always the answer.
More intentional rest usually is.
Why We’re So Bad at Treating Exhaustion
As I went down the research rabbit hole, something became painfully clear:
Most advice for managing exhaustion is… wildly off.
“Self-care” advice aimed at women often boils down to massages, pedicures, and bubble baths. Men are told to stretch after lifting and maybe eat a vegetable. Not once did I see an article mention that there are multiple types of rest and that the wrong kind of rest won’t help you feel rested at all.
Speaking from experience, massages and pedicures do absolutely nothing for my exhaustion. Sometimes they make it worse, because now I’m still tired and annoyed that I spent a bunch of money trying to fix something that didn’t work.
That spiral usually ends with guilt and self-doubt:
Why didn’t that help? What’s wrong with me?
Turns out: nothing.
I just wasn’t tired in the way those things address.
Rest vs. Self-Care (They’re Not the Same)
Rest can be a form of self-care…but not all self-care is rest.
At its most basic, self-care is everything that supports health and functioning: eating, hygiene, boundaries, relationships. Eating vegetables and flossing are self-care. They are not rest.
Rest is about reducing load on specific systems in the body and nervous system. If you’re exhausted, choosing the wrong type of “self-care” won’t restore you, no matter how aesthetic it looks on social media.
The 7 Types of Rest
The seven types of rest are:
Physical
Mental
Emotional
Spiritual
Creative
Sensory
Social
Most of us are depleted in several at once.
Here’s a practical breakdown.
Physical Rest
This is the one we usually think of first: sleep, naps, stretching, gentle movement.
For active folks and athletes, one of the clearest signs you need physical rest is persistent soreness or declining performance. You cannot fix that by training harder. You fix it by resting.
The sweet spot is a combination of:
Passive rest (sleep, naps, days off)
Active rest (Pilates, yoga, stretch therapy)
That pairing can completely change how your body recovers.
Mental Rest
Mental rest means giving your brain a break from constant stimulation and expectation.
This can look like:
Meditation
Social media breaks
Time outside
Better time boundaries and fewer “always on” demands
When the brain never gets a pause, we see mental fog, irritability, poor sleep, and feeling overwhelmed by normal daily tasks. Your brain was never designed to fire at 100% all the time. Turns out our moms were right. Boredom is good for your brain and our constant state of mental stimulation through our phones, laptops and devices is draining us.
Emotional Rest
Emotional rest is the ability to be honest about how you’re actually doing and to feel your feelings without performing, fixing, or people-pleasing.
It often requires:
Stronger boundaries
Saying no
Stepping back from emotionally draining situations
Being truthful instead of “fine”
If you’re navigating chronic stress—caregiving, health issues, financial strain, relationship challenges—emotional rest can feel impossible. But it often starts very small:
Taking a break from news or social media
Saying “I’m not okay today”
Declining a request you don’t have capacity for
Acknowledging that you’re tired, sad, or overwhelmed
Small honesty creates space. Space creates rest.
Spiritual Rest
Spiritual rest isn’t just religious practice. It’s about connection and meaning.
If you’re feeling disconnected, ungrounded, or purposeless, spiritual rest can come from:
Community
Service
Nature
Practices that remind you you’re part of something bigger
Creative Rest
Creative rest is reconnecting with wonder and inspiration.
It can be hiking, painting, watching a bee pollinate a flower, or sitting in an audience instead of producing something. It’s about receiving, not output.
One thing worth naming here: hustle culture has convinced us that every hobby should be monetized. The moment a hobby becomes income, it stops being restorative. It becomes work.
Creative rest requires permission to:
Be messy
Be bad at something
Create without outcomes
Scribble. Play. Make something pointless. Go outside. Get messy.
Sensory Rest
Sensory overload happens when the brain takes in more stimulation than it can process: screens, noise, lights, notifications, constant input.
When this happens, the nervous system shifts into fight, flight, or freeze.
Sensory rest is the antidote:
Screen breaks
Quiet walks
Driving without music
Soft lighting
Stillness
Fun side note: boredom is a powerful creativity trigger. Your brain needs low stimulation to reset.
Social Rest
Social rest isn’t isolation. It’s spending time with people who don’t require performance.
Too much social rest leads to loneliness. Too little leads to exhaustion. The goal is connection without curation.
In a world of highlight reels, being fully seen, all of our messy bits included, is deeply restorative.
Why the 7 Types of Rest Matter at Pilates Native
Pilates Native is built on three pillars: Rest, Recover, Restore. Rest comes first for a reason.
Injury prevention starts with rest
Overuse injuries come from overexertion. Chronic fatigue leads to compensations, poor muscle recruitment, and burnout…which leads directly to injury.(Yes, this is literally our specialty.)
Your nervous system drives everything
If your nervous system is overstimulated, your training will suffer. A fried brain can’t coordinate efficient movement.Movement is medicine
The body is designed to move. Pilates and stretch therapy support circulation, joint health, breath, and nervous system regulation, without adding more stress.
Yes, I Spreadsheeted This
While mapping the seven rest types, I noticed a lot of overlap, so obviously, I made a spreadsheet.
The most efficient rest practices across multiple categories.
Taking breaks from social media
Going outside
Taking intentional breaks throughout the day
During this experiment, my phone died for five days. No warning. No backup. Just… gone.
While running a business. With my spouse out of town. During back-to-school chaos.
And somehow?
I slept better. I felt calmer. I had more actual downtime.
Since then, I’ve been far more intentional with screen limits, which does mean I’m sometimes slower to respond.
If you want to explore this more deeply, I’ve created a super basic and non-fancy downloadable 11×14 PDF mapping all seven types of rest and how to access them.
And I’d love to know:
Which type of rest do you need most right now?
See you soon,
– R
Junk Miles, Proper Form and Intentional Movement
Posted on January 10, 2025 by pilatesnative
In the running world, there’s a concept experienced runners know well: junk miles.
Junk miles are the miles you rack up when you’re just running to hit a number of miles in your training log. Unlike intentional training miles, the ones your run purposefully to build speed, endurance, strength, or clarity, junk miles lack focus or strategy.
In my experience, junk miles were always the ones that lead to fatigue, overuse injuries, and burnout.
On a run a few days ago, the idea of junk miles got me thinking about how we approach movement in Pilates and fitness in general, especially after a recent debate I had with another Pilates instructor.
During the discussion, the other instructor argued that form isn’t particularly important. They claimed there’s no real evidence linking poor form to injuries, pain, or other problems. Their perspective was that movement itself is the point—as long as someone is moving, they’re doing it right.
While I understand the idea and intention behind encouraging people to move, I couldn’t get on board with the idea that form is irrelevant.
Movement Without Intention:
The Pilates Equivalent of Junk Miles
In Pilates, as in running, not all movement is created equal. Simply “doing the reps” without paying attention to alignment, mechanics, or intentional engagement is the Pilates equivalent of ranking up junk miles in a running program. This kind of unchecked movement might not seem harmful in the short term, but over time, it can lead to overuse injuries, imbalances, and compensation patterns.
Here’s the thing. No matter what you believe about movement, the science is clear. Overuse injuries often stem directly from poor mechanics. When you repeatedly load your body in ways that don’t align with its natural mechanics, stress builds up in the wrong places.
A runner who collapses their knees inward with every step may develop knee pain over time.
A Pilates practitioner who doesn’t engage their deep core during a roll-up might strain their lower back instead of strengthening their core.
The body is amazing and it can adapt in some super cool ways, but it’s also prone to compensating. Those compensations can eventually lead to dysfunction and dysfunction can lead to aches, pains and weird injuries.
Proper form ensures that movement serves its intended purpose, whether that’s building strength, improving flexibility, or enhancing mobility.
We’d Never Tell a Weightlifter That Form Doesn’t Matter
Imagine telling a weightlifter that form doesn’t matter—that as long as they’re moving, they’re doing it right.
No way! It hurts to even think about, right?
Everyone knows that in weightlifting, proper form is non-negotiable. Without it, you’re looking at a high risk of acute injury (like a herniated disc or rotator cuff tear) and long-term damage to joints and muscles.
Why, then, would we dismiss form as unimportant in Pilates or other forms of mindful movement? This line of thinking may be rooted in outdated stereotypes that Pilates is “just stretching”, “just for women”, or not “real” exercise.
But anyone who’s ever spent time in a Pilates studio—or worked with an athlete to improve their mechanics—knows this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Pilates and weightlifting actually have a lot in common:
Both prioritize alignment and control to protect the body and build strength.
Both rely on progressive overload to safely challenge and improve.
And both require intentionality to yield the best results.
The idea that movement alone is enough, overlooks the depth and nuance of effective training, whether you’re lifting a barbell, practicing the Pilates Hundred, or running intervals on a track.
Intentional Movement Matters
Intentionality is the cornerstone of Pilates. Every exercise has a purpose, and proper form allows us to maximize the benefits while minimizing the risk of injury. Think of it this way:
In running: Intentional miles are planned with a goal in mind—speed intervals, hill training, or long endurance runs. Each type of run serves a purpose in building a well-rounded runner. (And yes, somedays you’re just running because it’s fun! But with proper form.)
In Pilates: Intentional movement focuses on alignment, breathing, and precision. Each exercise strengthens the body holistically, rather than reinforcing poor movement patterns. The fun in Pilates comes from the flow. And the flow comes from doing the exercises properly.
The argument that “movement is all that matters” just doesn’t cut it. Movement is wonderful, but movement without mindfulness can do more harm than good. Just as junk miles can sideline a runner, careless movement can create a foundation for pain and dysfunction for a Pilates practitioner.
Balancing out Form and Exploration
Not every movement needs to be perfect and we shouldn’t avoid trying new activities for fear of doing them “wrong”, but we need to balance form and exploration, joy and intention, freedom and awareness. There’s a time and place for everything.
Explore with reckless abandon at an intuitive dance class? Yes, absolutely.
Explore with reckless abandon while weight training or on the Reformer? No. Absolutely not.
As instructors, our job is to guide people toward movement that supports their goals and respects their bodies. That means emphasizing quality over quantity, form over mindless repetition, and intentional practice over aimless effort.
Whether you’re running a half marathon, lifting weights, or practicing Pilates, movement isn’t just about doing—it’s about how you do it. So let’s move with purpose, cultivate awareness, and leave the junk miles—on the mat, under the barbell, and on the road—behind.
The 3 Ghosts of Fitmas Past: Debunking Holiday Fitness Myths
Posted on December 19, 2024 by pilatesnative
The holiday season is full of joy, indulgence, and… questionable fitness advice. Every year, misinformation runs rampant, with every trainer, health coach, and diet trying to carve out space in our brains for those January deals.
I hate misleading marketing that uses shame and manipulation, so today, let’s take a journey with the “3 Ghosts of Fitmas Past.”
Disclaimer:
Our society tends to normalize disordered eating and extreme behavior, especially during the holidays. Many trending challenges and fitness tips mimic eating disorder behaviors. Needing to “earn” meals, over-exercising, binging + purging, and engaging in extreme diets are all eating disorder behaviors.
Participating in these doesn’t necessarily mean you have an eating disorder, but it’s important to recognize how harmful these habits can be. If you think you may be struggling, amazing resources like the National Eating Disorders Association (https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/) are available.
Ghost 1: The Fearmongering Ghost
This ghost thrives on myths designed to scare you into extreme behaviors.
Myth: You’ll gain 10 pounds over the holidays.
The Facts: Real weight gain requires sustained overeating—not a few indulgent meals. Most people gain just 1-2 pounds over the holidays, which is often due to water retention from carbs and salts found in festive foods, not fat.
Myth: You have to earn your holiday meals.
The Facts: Food isn’t a punishment or a reward. Approaching meals with an “earn it” mentality promotes disordered eating. It’s okay to enjoy your food without guilt. Please push back on those trends that promote doing a certain number of pushups, lunges, squats or burpies to “make up for” eating during the holidays.
Myth: You need to detox* after the holidays.
The Facts: Your body detoxes itself naturally. Extreme cleanses, fasts and juice diets are usually unnecessary and could harm your health. Instead, drink water, eat fiber-rich foods, and let your body do its job.
*This post is about food. If you feel like you need to detox from alcohol, do so carefully and if necessary consult with a medical professional.
Ghost 2: The Overdoing Ghost
This ghost loves to push extremes, convincing you to burn off indulgences at all costs.
Myth: Over-exercising will cancel out holiday indulgence.
The Facts: Overdoing it leads to burnout, injury, and fatigue. Rest and recovery are crucial, especially during a busy season.
Myth: Join the 1,000 Rep Challenge!
The Facts: These challenges—like 1,000 squats or 108 sun salutations—are more harmful than helpful. Excessive repetition isn’t a smart way to train; it’s a fast track to overuse injuries from poor form and exhaustion.
Myth: More sweat = more calories burned.
The Facts: Sweat is just your body’s cooling system, not a measure of effort. Focus on quality movement instead of the quantity of perspiration. You’ll want to avoid Hot exercise classes if you have a heart condition, high blood pressure, hypermobility or heat sensitivity.
Ghost 3: The Unrealistic Ghost
This ghost loves to sell oversimplifications and quick fixes.
Myth: Weight loss is just calories in, calories out.
The Facts: Weight loss isn’t always that simple. It’s influenced by stress, sleep, hormones, medication, age, allergies, food, and more. While calorie balance matters, overall health is about so much more.
Myth: January 1st is the magic reset day.
The Facts: There is no magic day to start healthy habits. Small changes—like walking, stretching, flossing, eating an apple for a snack—can happen anytime. Consistency beats grand resolutions every time.
Myth: Skip carbs to avoid weight gain.
The Facts: Carbs are your body’s fuel and a primary brain food. Instead of cutting them out, focus on whole-food options like sweet potatoes, fruits, and grains to support your activity level.
The Bottom Line
This holiday season, let go of the “Fitmas” myths and embrace balance. Movement should feel good—not punishing. Food should bring joy—not guilt.
The Intentional Pairing of Pilates and FST to Create “Corrective Experiences”
Posted on April 22, 2024 by pilatesnative
2024 Stretch to Win Case Study
My fitness and bodywork career started 14 years ago at a Sports Chiro clinic in Houston that specialized in sports injuries.
Every client who came to see me for Pilates or FST was either actively injured, recovering from an injury, or trying to prevent another injury. In addition to being in physical pain, these folks were frequently also in emotional pain and mental despair. Their pain and injuries took vibrant, healthy people and turned them into people who were desperate, angry, frustrated, and depressed.
My first truly deep understanding of just how injuries impacted our mental and emotional health came when I received an email from one of my client’s wives. This client had been an absolute bear to work with. He was an endurance cyclist who had herniated multiple disks. He was extremely cranky, short with his answers and shot daggers across the room with his glares. The first three sessions were typically grunts, as he barely spoke to me during our hour together. With each passing week, as his symptoms resolved, he became a little less cranky. He talked a little bit more. He started smiling, then laughing and it turned out he was an excellent conversationalist. I started looking forward to our sessions. When his prescribed number of Pilates and FST sessions were completed, he gave me a hug, thanked me, and walked out the door.
A week later, the email from his wife arrived. In one of the most heartfelt thank yous I have ever received, she explained that the injury had completely changed her husband’s personality. The incredibly happy go lucky man she’d married had turned into an asshole. He was always angry, always in pain. Their marriage was on the rocks, they’d been seriously considering divorce and had already met with a lawyer. When he started Pilates and FST, he was a little less grumpy at the end of the day. A little bit sweeter, a little bit more like himself. She’d waited, watching week by week as his symptoms unraveled the stranglehold they’d had on his mental and emotional health. As his symptoms resolved, his personality returned. They were able to work on their marriage and started to resolve the issues his behavior had created. Her email was a sincere thankyou for saving their marriage.
With that email, I knew I’d found my life’s calling; helping injured athletes heal their bodies by also supporting their mental and emotional health.
When Mr. Hill walked into my studio two years ago, he reminded me a lot of that client years ago. He was a strong, fit, healthy man in the prime of his life. He was also in debilitating pain that left him afraid to sit, to reach, to do any motion that would take his horrible-but-manageable-pain and turn into the excruciating-not-manageable type of pain.
A lifelong outdoor enthusiast, Mr. Hill was a rock climber, mountain biker, snowboarder, and hiker. The kind who went higher, harder, faster, further. The kind who jumped things, flew through the air and took fear as a personal challenge.
While previous neck and shoulder injuries had checked his activities before, a back injury brought all those adventures to a screeching halt.
The man in front of me hadn’t been on a bike or a board in months and was hiking desperately on his good days to get as much movement as he could before the pain took over. His days consisted of a constant mental chess game, calculating which moves were safe, which could be slightly altered to feel ok right now-with pain management planned for later, which activities were removed completely from the board, which activities would be traded for the others he really wanted to do. The mental and emotional exhaustion was palpable, as each session often started with a deep resounding sigh in response to “how’s it going?”
While Mr. Hill was doing his best to avoid surgery, we both knew it was on the table. In addition to seeing me for Pilates and FST, Mr. Hill was also treating his back pain with chiropractic, acupuncture, massage, PT, meditation, and therapy.
When working with Mr. Hill, I knew we had to work on mental and emotional safety around movement before tackling the traditional fitness concerns of stability, strength, and flexibility. Without safety, progress would be impossible.
We started with a functional core strength and range of motion test, with Mr. Hill moving his own body into various ranges of motion. I noted which positions caused anxiety, fear, or were avoided completely. Next, I used an FST session to assess his passive range of motion, this time noting any guarding and whether the available range matched the guarding or fear response in the ranges previously noted.
After seeing where Mr. Hill was able to move and how he reacted to certain positions, I created an FST and Pilates plan that kept him well within the areas where he felt comfortable, but focused on creating stability, strength, and mobility around the area of injury.
By stabilizing and strengthening around the injury, while also gently increasing mobility, we were able to create some relief in the pain points, while also building confidence and security in those ranges. Each week, we used FST to find and assess where those edges and boundaries were, downregulate the nervous system, improve range of motion and mobility, and teach the body new patterns.
Throughout our sessions together, there were excellent days where pain was minimal, strength and mobility were maximal. There were also days when pain was maximal, and our focus was really on managing the flare and moving in ways that felt good and provided relief.
While Pilates and FST weren’t the magic bullet we’d been hoping for, they did provide some relief as well as a strong pre-surgery foundation. After a series of disappointing nerve ablations, Mr. Hill opted for L5-S1 fusion, which was successful.
After surgery, Mr. Hill had much more available range of motion and we were able to focus even more in depth on recovering strength, mobility and range of motion that had been lost due to the original injury, as well as post-surgery recovery. We also continue to work on what Mr. Hill calls “corrective experiences”, a term borrowed from the book “The Way Out” by Alan Gordon. Corrective experiences are successfully performing activities or movements, pain-free, that we typically avoid because we’re afraid they’ll cause pain.
By using Pilates and FST in an intentional way, we were able to create entire sessions of “corrective experiences” for Mr. Hill, teaching the mind and body that the various movements and patterns are safe and do not cause pain or pain flares. FST allowed us to find his boundaries and work right up to them in a way that didn’t cause pain or flares.
I am extremely humbled by Mr. Hill’s trust and have greatly appreciated his willingness to experiment together as we “do weird shit in the name of science”.
Working with him has allowed me to really refine my skills as a practitioner and I have been able to apply the same principles of using Pilates and FST to develop corrective experiences for all my clients. Whether they come in with labral tears, frozen shoulders, herniated disks or sciatica, the results have been absolutely astounding.
Applying FST to my Pilates sessions has given me a deeper understanding of and connection to my clients. I can assess them tactilely in a way that is safe and helpful to their nervous systems. FST also gives me the ability to teach their body new patterns in a way that is gentle and beneficial to their joint and muscular health.
As a long time Pilates Instructor, I’m very excited about the results and the pace we’re achieving them with the intentional pairing of Pilates and Stretch Therapy when dealing with chronic pain.
What I’ve found is that my clients aren’t just getting relief. They’re getting their lives back. From spending a day snowboarding confidently, joining a dance class they’d never even attempt before, learning how to do handstands, or even just lifting something into a grocery cart or loading a dishwasher without pain, the results have spoken for themselves. “Corrective Experiences” are where it’s at.
A giant heartfelt thanks goes out to each of my clients who have joined me in experimenting, playing and “doing weird shit in the name of science”.
Have a great day,
-Rubecca
p.s. As always, I LOVE to hear your thoughts on these posts. Feel free to reply to email or bring up this topic in your next session.
Rejecting hustle culture
Posted on October 26, 2021 by pilatesnative
Running a business + honoring my own needs
Good morning lovely people! Just a quick reminder that this is my week off from the studio.
When I first started down this path as a Sports Therapist for a Chiro clinic, I was working 40 hours a week and seeing patients on 30 min intervals. It was fun and I learned a ton, but man…between the patient notes, individualized planned sessions and demonstrating, it was mentally, emotionally and physically exhausting. After work, I’d get home and just sit on the couch just staring into space for an hour before gearing up to take the dogs running or doing normal life activities. One of the reasons I went back to engineering was because I needed something that was a little less energy intense.
When I opened the studio, I knew 3 things:
burnout was the number one reason fitness professionals move on from the industry
overwork and underpay killed the passion for most small business owners
my own energy limitations
Unlike most small businesses where we jump in 100% working 24/7, this little studio was designed with strong boundaries around my energy, including the number of clients and hours worked. My first openings for availability was limited to 3 clients per week! That sounds CRAZY, right? Who starts a business limited to just 3 clients?!?!
But here’s the thing. When I honor my own energy needs and limitations, I can give my clients 100% every session. I LOVE being in the studio, I LOVE creating that safe calm space for you guys. And I LOVE every minute we are together.
When I was working 40 hours a week, I didn’t love my job after about 20 hours. And that sucked big time.
As my ability to take on studio hours increased, I wanted to make sure I was honoring my own energy needs and decided my business plan would include limited hours/clients per week AND the ability to give myself a week off every 6 weeks.
This was a HUGE decision. It meant I had to be brave enough to walk the walk and talk the talk, following all of my own advice to clients on the importance of self care, prioritizing your needs, and knowing when to take a break BEFORE you break.
It meant going against all conventional small business advice of hustling, nose to the grindstone, don’t stop ‘til you get enough.
And it meant either closing the studio for a week every 6 weeks and no income that week or finding a dedicated sub that I could trust to keep things rolling.
In theory, it was a terrible idea.
In practice, it’s been the BEST business decision ever.
My clients were amazingly receptive and supportive of the idea.
I’ve found two amazing subs who have started to create relationships with regular clients and provide incredibly valuable insight and variety to the client practice.
And I’ve even found that some clients will schedule their own trips, appointments or other self care things during that week break. Together, we’re walkin’ the walk.
Long story short? Rejecting hustle culture, honoring my needs and building a business with strong boundaries around those needs has allowed the culture of self care to thrive in the studio. It’s not just some catch phrase we throw around. It’s what we do.
Hell ya.
Have an awesome week! I miss you already and can’t wait to see you next Tuesday!
Honoring all the good stuff,
-Rubecca
Taking your body on a stretch date
Posted on September 30, 2021 by pilatesnative
Stretching should feel good. Lemme say that again.
STRETCHING SHOULD FEEL GOOD.
None of that “no pain, no gain” bullshit. I’m serious, folks. When stretching, you want to aim for a pleasant tension. Any burning, stinging, ripping, tearing or pain while stretching is a sign that you’ve gone too far. So back it up (waaaaay up) and apply “The First Date Principle”.
The First Date Principle…Or how to take your muscles on a stretch date
1 Go slow. Sloooooooow. Even slower. Take your time and ease into each stretch slowly and gently. Move too quickly and date’s over!
2 Be gentle. If you are aggressive, your muscles are going to metaphorically run away from you and hide. No second date for you!
3 Be a good listener. Listen to the signs your body is giving you, whether it’s telling you to slow down, back off, or proceed with caution. How well you listen to your muscles is going to determine how well this stretch date goes and whether or not you’re getting that metaphorical 2nd date. You want that 2nd date. You NEEEEED that 2nd date.
What if it’s awkward and uncomfortable?
By rule, all 1st dates are awkward and uncomfortable. If it’s been a while since you’ve taken your muscles on a stretch date, you may feel some new sensations. Some positions may be tight, uncomfortable, feel a little awkward, or have an “increased awareness” around them. You know the difference between these things and pain. It is your job to listen and pay attention and make sure these sensations never dip into the pain pool. Remember, pleasant tension.
Cheers to you having an amazing stretch date!
-Rubecca
Rest and Play in a time of Stress and Chaos
Posted on November 5, 2020 by pilatesnative
Y’all, this has been the CRAZIEST year. We have literally pivoted and pivoted and pivoted again as this year has changed how we work, school, commute, shop, socialize and exist. It has been bananas.
I started out writing a super long email about the benefits of a forced rest and how bodies are presenting so much differently on the stretch table the last few weeks, but Mailchimp deleted everything and in recovery mode, I realized I most wanted to share with you an inspiring story about play instead.
A few days ago, my brother gave my kiddo a jump rope. It’s nothing special, just a cast-off old jump rope that my brother just didn’t want to take with him on his recent move. Rio treated that thing like gold and for the entire day, he carried it around in his pocket like a special treasure, finding pockets of space large enough for him and his jump rope.
At first, he was terrible. Just awful. This kid couldn’t get a single jump before he’d trip, fall over, whip himself in the head, or whack his jump rope on a wall, car, tree, other other random item he’d set up too close to.
But he kept trying.
He even brought his jump rope with us on our daily walk, stopping to jump every few steps. On our walk, he said “Mama, watch me jump 10 times!”
He jumped twice. Tripped. Laughed, yelled “I got two!”
Jumped four times. Tangled. “Ok, that’s four!” He said.
Jumped another four times. “Did you see me jump 10 times?!?! Oh ya, I did it!” And he continued to celebrate his way out of a jump rope tangle.
Watching him celebrate, I realized he was setting SMART goals and celebrating his wins like a champ.
His goal was totally specific. 10 jumps.
It was measurable.
It was attainable.
It was realistic.
And it was timed.
He didn’t add in any extra qualifiers or quantifiers to his 10 jump goal. He didn’t say, I’m going to jump 10 times without stopping, or 10 times with my eyes closed, or 10 times every day for 10 times a day. Nope.
He wisely chose to jump 10 times in any fashion and celebrate the win.
Watching him celebrate, I realized just how often we, as grownups, gatekeep ourselves and set ourselves up for failure. We add so many extra qualifiers and quantifiers to our goals that the things we enjoy become work. We gatekeep ourselves out of enjoyable activities and communities by adding extra requirements that don’t need to be there.
Worst of all, we burn ourselves out by never celebrating our wins.
Here’s the thing. By instinctively setting a SMART goal and celebrating his little win, Rio kept himself motivated and kept his chosen activity, jump roping, fun. He spent the entire afternoon on the driveway jump roping, setting goals, giving himself positive pep talks, counting, celebrating.
He created an entire celebration dance.
He cheered himself on with shouts of “Oh yeah, oh yeah, check me out!”.
The next afternoon, he was still jump roping.
But he wasn’t tripping. He wasn’t tangling. He wasn’t whacking himself or anything else with this jump rope.
He was jumping up to 30 reps in a go, attempting tricks like single leg or eyes closed, skipping while jumping, and scheming for how he could scooter and jump rope at the same time.
His celebrations kept him motivated. His motivation gave him momentum. His momentum gave him excitement and inspiration. The inspiration kept things fun. And when things are fun, we want to keep doing them.
Without realizing it, this kiddo taught his Mama 2 HUGE lessons.
1) It’s so much easier to get better at something when it’s fun and we want to keep “playing”.
and
2) He showed me just how necessary celebrating the little wins really is for our long term motivation, momentum and inspiration.
This week, I challenge you to join me in celebrating one teeny tiny little win in a big way. No matter what the little win is, go crazy. Create your celebration dance. Jump up and down. Yell “oh yeah I did it, I did it oh yeah”. Shout “Oh yeah!! Check me out!”.
Signing off with wishes for a day filled with pockets of rest and play. And as always, Pilates Native is here to provide you with a safe space to rest, play and celebrate the little wins with Pilates and Stretch Therapy.
Take care and see you soon,
Rubecca